Empress Anna and her Hummingbird

I have a love hate relationship with my artwork. Do you ever feel that way? Sometimes halfway through a piece it changes it's mind and decides it wants to be something else, completely different!

Such was the situation with these dolls. I had every intention of turning them into respectable, well mannered reproductions, to look just like their antique counterparts. Well, all the best laid plans of mice and men, or however that old saying goes...

I had barely gotten the beautiful sea green glass eyes in Anna's head when I heard...
She: hu hem, Empress Anna that is and I, I should like to go, go somewhere over, over the fabled rainbow!
Me: Oh, no you don't! You just keep quiet!

I have perfect plans for you! A doll you shall be, and a fully jointed compo body already awaits you! And, and, I have purchased from my favorite doll dress maker a frock so similar to the one your antique sisters wore, with pretty little pleats and buttons and more!
She: No, no! Not for me!

You see, I am different and special you see! All those years I have waited, in that old cold mold, just wanting and wishing and hoping you see, to be poured and fired and painted and my dream, yes my dream was to be completely transformed into well, dare I say it? Say it I dare, a work of art, lovely art for all to then share! Not just a quiet, old boring, old doll!

Me: But, but you see that small doll lying over there? The one with the bright yellow blonde hair, I was going to turn her into a little dolly just for you! Now wouldn't that be nice?!

She: I want her I do, but I want her to be my very own humming birdie!
Me: Humming bird?! Humming bird, you say?

She: Oh yes! And remember that metal bird cage, the one with the dome, the one that you keep outside in the sun?! I want it for mine, I want it for "me"! That is where my little humming birdie shall be!

Me: Well, I guess we could do that?! I guess there's no harm!
She: Oh yes, and remember that wonderful, ruffled edge, blue and white pin striped (my how she does carry on) corset cover I saw you bring home one day?! It's mine! I love it and know it will perfectly fit! Yes, just rightly!

And remember those ever so long, long legs, the ones that buckle and bend at the knee, and wear the ever so shiny black patent leather boots?

I, the Empress Anna would like those too!
Me: Well, I'm starting to get the picture, I can see, I can see how they would be perfect for you, I do, I do!

And I'm thinking you will need a fancy headdress as well, come to think of it I do have the most luminous, lustrous freshwater pearls I've been saving for just the right thing!

Oh yes, lest I forget a delicate, dangling pair of sapphire ear fobs, they will look just right with the blue and white pin stripe!

Me: Ok, ok I agree, you shall, you shall be Empress Anna to me!

She: hu hem,well done! And now what about, what about my little humming birdie?!

Can she be, will she be a sweet little birdie all just for me?

In ruffles and lace and ribbons and bows?!

From the top of her head to the tips of her toes?!

She: To stay,

and to play,

and to swing all day long and maybe if she wishes,

sing a buzzy humming bird song?

She: Do they sing? Well, maybe not, and I really don't care,

I just want to see her wisp wings flutter on air!

And if she chooses, I'll set her free, with hopes that someday she'll come back to me!

Me: Well, I think, I think thats just lovely, I think thats just fine.

You're a sweet honest Empress and soon to be mine!

Tempus Fugit

Where shall I start? Maybe where I left off last night, 12,692, sheep that is!

I am a certified (if there were such a thing) insomniac.

Sleep is practically an exotic luxury for me. Much like a lush oasis in the middle of the desert!

{I say, who are you there peering through at me, and what delicious delights do you possess?}
12,693,
Sleeping at times is like chasing the elusive pot of gold at the end of my rainbow! It is certainly a highly prized event when I do get a good nights sleep!

In those precious too few hours that I am able to nod off the time passes by in a sort of continuous moving picture show,

reel to reel and in vibrant technicolor! Accompanied by what sounds to me like it can only be Dolby Stereo!

I recall, I always have the fleeting thought that, I wish someone would please turn it down a smidge ( you know, like with the TV dream remote control ).

{A little nonsense now and then is relished by the best of men! My homage to Daffy Duck in the cartoon The Mustache Bandit!}
12,694,
I awaken many days more exhausted from the previous nights adventures than before I actually went to bed!

Don't get me wrong, an overactive imagination is most certainly a blessing, albeit somewhat disguised( at least that's what my Grandpapa used to tell me)! I have learned to live with it, even take advantage and make good use of it, maybe I am just a night owl?! Huh, never thought of that before!

I guess I must catch just enough Zzzzz's to keep me going because really my only complaint is that there doesn't ever seem to

be enough time to implement all the ideas that come rushing in, to recreate and capture the dreamy visions I've just been privy to!

I do my very best to keep up, there are sketch books stacked high simply filled to overflowing, and yes, even stuffed with odd bits of doodled napkins.

{Look at the world thru sapphire colored glasses for spectacular signs of life!}
12,695,
Countless scribbles on restaurant receipts and theatre tickets with written notes jotted down on any available blank spot!

I think if I could live 9 or 10 lifetimes, there still would not be enough time to create all I would wish to!
And all I have plans for!

Oh to be magical, mystical, I would "Pop" more hours into each and every day!

{Remove that skin you've been hiding in! Yes, it can be cold, but only for a moment!}
12,696,
"Zap" more minutes into every hour!

"Zing" more heart beats to the all ready too short span!

And blow many, many, many more breaths, ah, to catch, to catch! Where does the time go?!

And while we're on the subject, will someone please tell me how the 80's got so far away?!
Time is of the essence and I would like another serving! Please, may I have some more Sir?
Sweet dreams my friends!
12,697, sheep that is!
And counting!

What if?

Eye was thinking...

When is a doll just a cigar, I mean doll? ( I know my attempts at humor are awful!) Le petite french poupee sitting quietly on a shelf,

countless books have been written of their wide eyed far away stare, apple cheeks and painted titled smiles.

Are the little mannequins just the sum of their parts,

graceful elongated china arms,

to gently hold you,

delicate sloping legs ending in two tone button down boots,

or even sweet little woolen knee highs and bow tied mary janes.

Perhaps a fully jointed composition body ready for restorations and repairs?

Maybe she is but a mere silent treasured novelty

with cork pate and curly wig and

the teeniest tiniest pair of chestnut brown sleep eyes, all the better

to see you with my dears! Or is she a wealth of information waiting to be tapped? Does her mood change when her wardrobe does?

A lacey Edwardian fit neatly around

a gusseted kid leather body.

Maybe a playful "A" line made from Great Grandmama's cast offs.

Does she feel happy or sad or silly or mad?

Does she yearn to taste a cookie or two or three and a sip of warm chamomile tea with just a touch of honey, no lemon, yes milk. Thank you.

Will she become a spoiled naughty girl when I put her bits together or what if,

what if, I indulge in my more playful desires and turn her into an art doll,

a piece only to be studied and evaluated, never to be held in the arms of a young confidante?

Will the others laugh at her, call her names because she is different?

Will she care and what if, what if, she can never, ever become a girl at all? These thoughts cross my mind, do you wonder if they whisper when we walk away, "Silly humans, so complicated, they should try to be happy just dressed up and pretty"! "It's easy, it is, it is! A doll is a constant faithful companion a friend not a foe, she will happily cheer you up and chase away your woes.

Countless secrets have been shared and tears have been shed and sweet little prayers said just before bed.

Is her worth in dollars and cents, rare and valuable or just that she sees your point of view? I think that I vote for the latter of the two. All in all be a kind curator to your trusted friend, tend to her needs, keep her lovely and dusted and dry, for you never know... I could swear I have walked into my room and out of the corner of my eye just caught the slightest glimpse of, well, I'm not quite sure, but I know I saw something!

You see, I've been thinking. Adieu, see you later!