Wednesday, October 29, 2008
I'm going to tell you all a story.... hope you don't mind if I start in early on my Halloween treats! I really just can't hold out any longer! No kidding, I have had a sweeeeet tooth for as long as I can remember! As the days begin to grow shorter and the nights stretch out longer,
I am reminded of a story my Uncle once told me. I'm sure you are familiar with Jack O'lantern,a mostly respectable chap, descended from a long line of O'Lanterns. But do you know how that poor guy ended up in such a predicament? When he was but a young boy round abouts 1868 I'd say, he snuck into Mrs. W. Hazel's pumpkin patch,
and sure enough, she caught him! Little did he know the W stood for Witch, as in Witch Hazel! She nabbed him red handed with her best and most prized pumpkin, the particular one she had high hopes for at the upcoming County Fair! There on the very spot that he stood...ZAP! Well, you know the rest!
Now that Jack he was a handsome devil he was and he had himself a gal, yes quite a girl. A most fetching lass and devoted, she carried his photographic image with her every where she went. A smart and snappy dresser too, very fashion forward for the times!
Mmmm, Yummy, yum yum!
She wore THE largest silk rose and THE most exotic feathers in her fancy top hat,
and on special occasions she would wear a brooch made out of a shrunken head! Some say it was her ex, but I guess we'll never know for certain!
And on her crow toed boots were two shiny cut steel buckles, Oh how they did sparkle and Click, Clickety ~ Clacked when she walked down the street,
you could hear her coming a mile away!
Around her neck was a tangle of necklaces, one in particular was very important, a locket given to her by her mother when she was just a girl of sweet sixteen.
It holds a portrait painted by her father, she wears it every single day with out fail,
she likes to keep it close to her heart.
CRUNCH! ...chew... Oh, where are my manners?!...chew...I have neglected to tell you her name! It is Jill, Jill O'Lantern! You see along the way Jack and Jill got married!
Just look at her admiring her pretty, pretty orange pumpkin self!
And I will tell you a funny secret about ole Jill, but keep it to yourself, else she would have my head, so to speak! Come here, lean over real close so I can whisper in your ear...
tucked away in her handbag, among the collected calling cards and coins (she keeps for emergency penny candy cravings)
is her pet frog, Herbert...
MUNCH! MUNCH! Chew, chew.
thats not even the funniest part.
Every once in a while a passer by might hear the occasional RRRiibbittt...
and Jill, being ever so delicate and ladylike, puts her dainty gloved hand to her lips and says,
Ooops! Pardon Me!
Hee, hee and no one is ever the wiser!
Mmmm, CRUNCH! chew, chew.
Well, to make a long story short, the years passed by and the fair Jill grew older, as we all eventually must do.
But she never, ever forgot about her beloved Jack.
Every once in a blue moon,
she would get out his favorite book of poetry and
just quietly read,
thinking sweet thoughts of him.
And when the sun began to set and the candles burned way down low,
CHOMP! chew, chew.
She would take one long deep breath...make a wish upon a wish, times two,
blow the candles out with a Prrbbbttt...and wander on upstairs to bed.
Happy Halloween to all and to all a Goodnight!
Visuals details: Antique french dress form, Victorian mourning dress adorned with tiny jet beads, jet, ruby and pearl strands, circa 1870 black leather boots,collapsible eye glasses on chain, large carved craft pumpkin, nose sculpted out of polymer clay, rubber frog hand painted to look realistic.
Sunday, October 12, 2008
Hello, I, James T. Crow will be your narrator, Halloween is a time of fantasy, witches, ghosts, creepy crawlies, all type of hobgoblin & scary stories abound, spooky tales of yesteryear, from long, long ago... so here, just for you, I have knitted these words together to create a magical scarf of whimsy to wrap around
your neck and keep you warm & toasty on a cool Autumns eve, enjoy my little "Fractured Fairy Tale!"
Once upon a time, far, far away, lived a tiny witch, as a matter of fact, this witch was the witchiest of all the tiny witches, a mostly good witch, hardly ever bad, that is not to say never! No, never say never, ever!
She lived in a crooked old house smack dab in the center of a quaint Lilliputian village, just 2 miles from Bremen as the crow flies. A charming place, but a spooky one too! There were very tall, very old trees in this small township, frightful trees,
wicked trees and maybe even a few downright evil trees! And if you aren't careful, one of those rickety old oaks will snatch you up, right by the scruff of the neck! Chomp, Gulp, Yikes! So take care when you are walking through on a dark night, for you
never know what you might find lurking, you see it is urban legend that the tiniest of witches wanders those woods riding
her magic broom, every year on Halloween, looking for her long lost bff, she had known since childhood,
a pretty young thing, so very petite, with beautiful eyes of blue, but the tangle is she was transformed and became a very good, not to mention smart witch when one of the elves (who works for the village shoemaker) made her a bright red cape out
of some left over scraps given to him by his friend, another elf named Rumpelstiltskin.
And you know, she wore that pretty red cape just about everyday! (I bet you know where this is going!)
Now, that tiny witch goes looking in the last place she remembers seeing her bff,
which would be the great library way up on Old Mother Hubbards Hill.
Come with me, follow along, but shhh, take care to keep quiet, be cautious for there might just be someone watching you! Oooo, I just got a cold chill!
Back in the dank, dark corners of that library, sits a book upon a high shelf, now this is no ordinary book, for you see
once the spine has been cracked & the pages opened this very special book takes one very long, very deep breath,
brushes the dust from it's crevices and comes to life! Believe it or not! And let me tell you this book is full of surprises!
I no sooner got the first page turned when, Flack, Flap, Flutter!
Out shot a shiny black crow with glowing red eyes! No kidding! I rubbed my eyes to make sure I saw what I was seeing! And I did, see it, I mean!
And can you guess what he said to me? Well, can you?! He cleared his throat with a gurgle & said "Go ahead, make my day, pluck a
tail feather & use it as a book mark, I insist!"
then he skipped two steps over to the ledge
and flew right out the window! Holy Moly, color me amazed! Most certainly a what you call, enchanted moment!
Well, anyway, as the story goes, that little witch was roaming those woods on the look out for Red,
thats what she called her, when sure enough she spotted that bright red hood in a clearing through the trees!
"Hello there, she called out, remember me?!"
But little Red didn't hear her,
she was just opening the very large door to enter her Grandmama's cottage. "Yoohoo! Anyone home, I've come to visit, and
brought you a basket of goodies Dear Granny!"
Red entered the bedroom to find Granny fast asleep," Oh Granny, I'm so happy to see you,
how have you been all these many days?"
"Eehem," (clears throat)
"Why, Hello my love!"
"Soooo very happy to see you again!"
"It's been such an impossibly long time and I've missed you!"
"What did you bring me in your little basket?"
"Why Granny, you look different, haven't you been well?"
(Oh boy, we're getting to the good part now!)
"My, my Granny, What big eyes you have!"
"All the better to see you with my Dear!"
"Oh, Hee, Hee Granny,
you're just so silly!"
"And, No Way, Granny,
What big ears you've got!"
"All the better
to hear you, my Dear!"
"Ha, Ha, Ha, Geez Granny, you really crack me up!"
Bleep! Bleep! Bleep! (ANNOUNCER) "Ladies and gentlemen, we interrupt our program to bring you a special bulletin from
the Intercontinental Radio News. Professor Pierson of Princeton Observatory reports something moving towards the earth
at a high velocity. At 9:15 pm Eastern standard time, seismograph registered a shock,
it is reported that at 8:50 pm a huge, flaming object, believed to be a meteorite, fell on a farm at Grover's mill, we have
dispatched a mobile unit to the scene!" (SWING BAND PLAYS THEN CUT TO ANNOUNCER)
"We take you now to Grover's Mill, New Jersey." (CROWD NOISES, POLICE SIRENS-ANNOUNCER) "Just a minute!"
"The top is beginning to rotate like a screw!"
(ANNOUNCER, FRIGHTENED & ALARMED) "Ladies and gentlemen, this is the most terrifying thing I have ever witnessed!"
Whoops!!! Wrong story!!!
"Well Granny, I think I've had just about enough of this nonsense,
I'm not stick'n around for dinner,
"See you later, alligator!"
"Kiss, kiss & Adieu!"
"Well, isn't that just a fine pot of stew, or none should I say?!"
"I'm off to find Hansel and Gretel, those two are not nearly as clever, and as I recall, a might bit chubbier too!"
So there you have a tiny tall tale, a bit of Trick and a smigde of Treat,
take good care of yourself & your little ones too,
you never know who might be prowling about, just waiting especially for you!
Happy All Hallows Eve & Halloween too! A cute little tale from me to you!
~CAST OF CHARACTERS~
Red Riding Hood...................................Juliette Evertson
Littlest Witch.........................................Juliette Evertson
Narrator................................................James T. Crow
Red eyed crow......................................Heckle Crow
Costume & set design...........................Sandra Evertson